Since the start of RE/ACT, I have noticed that the ‘emotions’ week is a very tough but important week. My goal in designing this week was not to stir up painful emotions and leave you sitting in them but rather to make you aware of your emotional world. I want you to be able to resolve painful emotions, and learn how to manage them in a healthy way; so that you will no longer go to Fight, Flight, or Freeze whenever you experience a painful emotion. I hope that you have learned some tools to do that, and have seen that getting healthy and staying clean are dependent on you developing a higher EQ (Emotional Quotient).
I want to give you two perspectives that I hope will encourage you:
- Throughout my life, I have seen many people go through similar experiences that involved intense pain but I have seen people respond to it differently. Some become angry and bitter and some shut down and try not to feel; but others walk into the pain, learn the lessons of it, figure out what they need to do to resolve it, and grow as a result of it. In other words, the same pain makes some people stronger and better, whereas it makes others weaker and sicker. It is dependent on how people choose to respond to it.
- I heard someone make an observation once, and it really impacted me. It was that as you look at history, you discover that the people God used for the greatest tasks were those who have experienced the greatest pain, and allowed it to shape their character in a positive way.
Complex Trauma created tons of pain that a child could not resolve so, in order to survive, they had to go to Fight, Flight, or Freeze. My hope for each of you is that you apply the tools you have learned so that the pain that used to send you in negative directions will now make you stronger and better.