Imagine our boss comes up to us while we are on the job and says we have been doing great work lately. He suggests we meet next week or so to discuss some changes.

Do we become curious and embrace the idea or feel paralyzed because we are afraid of change?

The only thing guaranteed in life is that everything is subject to change. Our ability to handle change comes from our experiences as children. 

Growing up in adverse environments or in Complex Trauma, change may have been a constant worry in our lives. Every time things changed, we may have experienced more hurt, pain and abandonment. 

Broken promises from caregivers and parents may have offered disappointment, and left us feeling unworthy. 

Or, there was very little change in our lives. Routines and structure were such an integral part of our daily lives, there was no room for change. This may have provided a sense of safety and security, but may have instilled a fear of change. 

Change may have been moving from one foster home to another. From one school to another. Too much change causes insecurity. 

In a healthy home, children learn resilience. They embrace change and something good comes from it. 

For those with Complex Trauma, change is scary. In the past they may have been subjected to teasing or bullying, or set up for failure. They are convinced nothing good will happen and a lot of stress is created with anticipated change.

We have no power to stop time. Change is part of our evolution process.

We see it in nature with the four seasons. 

Businesses grow, reorganize and restructure to become more efficient.

Relationships grow and change with time as children move from pre-school, to school-aged then off to post-secondary education or the workforce.

Our lives evolve and change as we embark on our recovery journey. 

Our perception needs to change. Believing healthy change will bring positive results and improve our lives is an important part in recovery. Change can offer us a fresh start. A chance to create a happy life filled with peace, contentment and joy. 

We may have a default setting to fear change when most of our experience has left us with negative outcomes. It is scary to change our thinking to expect positive outcomes. 

Let us show you how. Visit timfletcher.ca to learn more.